Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Colour Me Co-Dependent


I am looking for the man i will be hapy with all my life and that will show me the real colour of love that will always make me happy and that i will be able to call the love of my life and i will be happy with all my life and that will be able to give me his shoulder when i need it and i will also be able to give mine when he is in need of it as well...And i will love ll my life and i will be happy to call the love of my life....beth


Did anyone else have to read this a few times before it sunk in? And when you read it, was the voice in your head completely monotone?


A post like this will get the men flocking in about as fast as Janet Reno promising free lap dances after they let Steve Buscemi fart in their face. There isn't a man that I have met in my lifetime that has said they were specifically looking for clingy, needy and obsessed. Although, they have no problem over-looking those traits if they come wrapped up in a Giselle Bundchen package, however after the novelty wears off, Ms. I Need You To Be Here For Me To Be Happy will be left eating sprackets kicked up from his back tires.


I have a strong feeling Beth is the kind of gal you see in the darkest corner of a coffee shop. Hunched over, wearing over-sized wool ponchos and chewing on a twisted section of her hair while stiring her Mocha-Frap-Soy-Half-Wit-Light-Foam concoction. She probably giggles to herself and snorts when she finds her inner thoughts especially amusing.


When interacting with those of the opposite sex face to face, she probably stumbles on her tongue and finds it hard to form a complete and understandable sentence. So, she takes to the internet! Brilliant idea! Cheers to you Beth! You suck at it here, too!


4 comments:

Tribblehappy said...

"Mocha-Frap-Soy-Half-Wit-Light-Foam"
LOL

No, the voice reading the ad in my head wasn't monotone. It was a shrill 5 year old girl (in a pointy princess hat with streamers at the tip) rather like a kid on santa's lap, "I want a pony and snow and whore barbie and a new pair of shoes and..." *facepalm* learn to punctuate, people!

The Half-Assed Blog said...

I had the monotone voice from reading the ad... with a touch of frenzy and LSD.

I am the person hunched over in the coffee shop corner laughing to myself, but I get real coffee with real milk in it and don't post acid-laced personal ads on the internets.

Calantha said...

It has to be because I'm posting late at night, but reading "the true colour of love" made me think of that Celine Dion song. That can't be good. I don't think even Celine would approve of this ad.

Persnickety Ticker said...

That Janet Reno/Steve Buscemi image will now be forever burned in my mind and haunt me for the rest of my life.

Gee that's nice.

Thanks for making me laugh til I hurt!

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